Emotional Intelligence

Oh goodness me. Yeah,… no. I grabbed this book after seeing the surname “Goleman” listed, mistakenly thinking quickly that this had been a quick novel penned by Daniel Goleman, and of course, not actually reading the full author name (in my defense, remember that many times surnames are how these books are organized, so one can see how I made the mistake). Granted, this is what I get for checking out books from the Kindle Unlimited ‘Psychology/Self-Help’ section at 2:39 in the morning. 

I’d love to give a full in-depth analysis of every qualm I had while reading this, but honestly, I think the book speaks for itself. So, without further ado, I will present some bangers from this book (not actually bangers! Why was this included in a nonfiction book?!):

1. “As long as an action remains someone else’s fault, you do not have any control over what that person actually does.” (In a chapter about taking responsibility for your own actions)

2. “However, if you admit to yourself that you are the reason for the things that go wrong in your life, you can take steps to ensure that you no longer act in conflict with your best interests.” (Totally see the intention here, and agree that it is 1000% important to acknowledge your role and choices in situations,… but the way this is phrased is directly where I take so much issue with much of the ‘self-help’ genre in general. It’s a pitch of “if you’re not successful, YOU are the reason for your own failure”).

3. “Here’s the thing, you are either an empathetic person or you’re not.” (The opening line of a chapter titled, “How To Develop Empathy In Your Everyday Life” ).

4. A Dialogue:
A: “I should probably check the social conditioning I have received on the expected gender roles in society.”
B: “Yes, like the fact that dads are parents too and not babysitters.”
A: “Haha, exactly!”
(I don’t think any human person would ever UNironically say aloud that first sentence.)

5. “In such instances, how are you expected to be empathetic? It’s simple really. You just have to use your imagination.” (Stated when discussing empathy for situations you have not personally experienced).

6. “You cannot empathize with another person simply because they exist.” (Bummed to have learned this D: )

7. “Winston Churchill defined tact as the ability to tell someone to go to hell while make them look forward to the trip. This really does sum up everything that you need to know about how to handle conflict should it arise in your life.” (*Logical arguments have left the chat*)

8. “How hard can it to be a good listener? Not too hard. You just have to sit there and nod attentively while keeping your eyes trained on the speaker.” (A point of summary in the CONCLUSION OF THE BOOK. THIS IS A TAKEAWAY.)

Final note that this book also does not actually include references to any of the points or arguments that are made. There is a short reference list at the very end of about 5 sources, but no actual references throughout the body of the arguments.

Overall Rating: 1.25/5

Would I Recommend? No